Bits: Monk Fight Edition

-The British Telegraph newspaper has a fun article that lists 50 things you didn't know about Barack Obama. I actually knew a couple of these. Interestingly, none of the 50 involves him being a terrorist, but he did have a pet monkey at one point and has read every Harry Potter novel, so same difference I suppose.

-By popular demand, more cholera news. There is another, perhaps more serious outbreak taking place right now at a refugee camp in the Congo. As you may now, the Nation Formerly Known as Zaire is in the midst of yet another civil war, and thousands of people are being driven into small areas in these makeshift camps. There's a cease-fire in place right now, but it is apparently unraveling. There are fears that the disease will spread if the cease-fire fails and the refugees are forced to scatter. Complicating matters is a lack of the medication that cure the disease, as well as an organized method of distribution.

-The police had to be called to the Church of the Nativity in Bethlehem, supposedly built on the site where Jesus was born, after monks from two different sects got into a violent brawl. The church has long been run in an uneasy joint arrangement between the Greek Orthodox, Armenian Orthodox, and Coptic churches. In this case the Greeks tried to block a procession by the Armenians, "so that the Armenians could not establish a claim which they do not have." Um... anyway, violence ensued. This is the same place where there has been a ladder outside the entrance since the 19th century because the three sects can't agree on who has the authority to take it down.

-Cracked.com's latest history lesson/list/funny caption collection involves the six stupidest points people died trying to prove.

-The latest thing we're boycotting: Utah, for the Mormon Church's aggressive support of California's gay marriage ban, unique because it took away from people a right that had already been granted. As things we're boycotting go, this one makes more sense than most.

-Today's Free TV on the Internet: The Daily Show/Colbert Report election special. Not as great as it could have been, but still has Stephen Colbert delivering state electoral votes with a parrot perched on his shoulder.

Bits: Wildflower Decapitation Edition

Awesome.

-A video from a random episode of the old Batman series has been making the rounds of the YouTubes because it appears to offer commentary on the 2008 election... 40 years in advance. There are several parallels that can be seen in this clip alone, which features Batman and the Penguin engaging in a debate prior to an election for Mayor of Gotham City. Of course, this campaign has become such a caricature of itself that it's no wonder it reminds people of a campy 60s TV series.



-Unsettlingly, anecdotal evidence increasingly suggests that early voting sites across the country are being targeted by angry protestors, specifically anti-Obama protestors. This article describes an incident in North Carolina, and features video. So... you're protesting voting? Why not protest Obama by going into the early voting place and voting against him? And I especially like the comment that "Sundays are for church, not for voting"... by the person who's spending her Sunday protesting instead of in church.



-All over the news today... the discovery on the Arizona/Utah border (within Vermillion Cliffs National Monument) of what is being termed a "Dinosaur Dance Floor." How did it get this name? To quote Newswise.com:

“Get out there and try stepping in their footsteps, and you feel like you are
playing the game ‘Dance Dance Revolution’ that teenagers dance on,” says
Marjorie Chan, professor and chair of geology and geophysics at the University
of Utah. “This kind of reminded me of that – a dinosaur dance floor – because
there are so many tracks and a variety of different tracks.”

The find apparently includes thousands of dinosaur tracks in a very small area, in some places a dozen per square yard. There are least four different species represented. The scientists are theorizing that the tracks were formed at an oasis in what that time was a huge area of sand dunes, larger than today's Sahara. I have to throw in one more quote here:

Seiler envisions the dinosaurs were “happy to be at this place, having wandered
up and down many a sand dune, exhausted from the heat and the blowing sand,
relieved and happy to come to a place where there was water.”

Ah, yes, poetical scientists.



-Rather interesting news from Switzerland today, a nation always on the cutting edge when it comes to government. A new law bans the humiliation of plants. Recently, the Swiss Parliament asked a special committee of philosophers, lawyers, geneticists, and theologians to determine the meaning of dignity as it pertains to plants. They have issued their report, which says that it is morally wrong to participate in "the decapitation of wildflowers at the roadside without rational reason", and it appears that parliament is acting on those guidelines. However, one wonders what the actual extent and/or enforceability of such a law would be. More here.



-Free TV On the Internet: Check out this past week's new Family Guy episode, "The Road to Germany". It's already infamous because it has Nazis wearing McCain/Palin buttons, which seems like an unlikely thing to have fixated upon in an episode that revolves around a port-a-potty time machine (which I suppose makes as much sense as a phone box) and a baby dressing up as Hitler.

Bits: Shark Jesus Edition

Pic courtesy of the-amazing.com

-According to NewScientist, Turkish creationist Adnan Oktar is offering $7.5 trillion dollars to anyone who can produce an intermediate-form fossil proving evolution. Um, haven't we already found those? I mean, the creationists have an argument ready against them, but we've already found, you know, fishes with legs. No sources have said where he would get that much money. Oktar recently sold 10,000 copies of a book denying evolution, and successfully campaigned to have Richard Dawkins' website banned in Turkey.

-San Francisco TV station KTVU reports that they're going to put a net under the Golden Gate bridge to prevent suicides. I'm trying to picture the thought process here... "You mean I can't jump off the Golden Gate? I'll have to use a less famous bridge, or maybe take a lot of pills? I dunno, maybe I'll just go on living then..."

-Shark Jesus! Scientists at an aquarium in Richmond, Virginia have reported that a female blacktip shark conceived without any male input... a virgin birth. The fetus was discovered during a necropsy on the mother shark after it had died of "complications." It contains no genetic material from a male. This is apparently not the first time this has happened, as there is much discussion in the linked article about "parthenogenesis," which apparently does not mean what Willow Rosenberg led me to believe it meant.

-In other news, the world economy continues its drain spiral. The Finance ministers from the G7 nations are meeting in Washington DC. Will they come up with a solution? Is the devil on the doorstep wearing galoshes?

-Alternative artist Banksy has opened an art installation in New York City that is a sort of insane magic pet store. I cannot make this stuff up. Make sure to watch the video with the dancing chicken nuggets, and the college-age girl wondering "Are they real?"

-Surprise! Not only does Life on Mars not suck, it got decent ratings last night. But not quite as decent as CBS' anti-science procedural (and yet another foreign remake) Eleventh Hour. "It's like that scary Fringe show, but safe and boring for old people!" I think that's actually their advertising campaign.

-Free TV on the Internet: Wednesday's episode of Bones, in my opinion the best procedural on TV, was about a murder in a tight-knit religious community on Chesapeake Bay. This brings out inherent conflicts among the characters, with Brennan getting lines like "You are all united by your shared superstition" and "Do these people believe in DNA?" Oh, yeah, it's called "The He in the She." Watch it here.

Bits: Sheep Tasering Edition

I'm going for fun stuff today... it's too serious around here!

-I had bus drivers who wish they thought of this. Apparently a bus driver in Florida stopped their school bus on the train tracks and told the kids that unless they started behaving they would just leave them there to get run over. Hey, it falls under my definition of "fun stuff," okay?

-Controversy has developed in Australia after police tasered a sheep that was blocking traffic. I have trouble believing the sheep was enough of a threat to warrant such treatment (Hey, police officers around the world, you're not supposed to taser somebody unless they're getting violent. 'Cause I think everybody must have been out sick that day), but you have to admit, the whole thing's hysterical. I only wish there was video.

-British supermarket chain Asda, owned by none other than Walmart (shocker!) is now selling beer for cheaper than water. The article seems to imply that this means that beer is too cheap... I would read it as water being way too expensive. I'll try not to go on my rant here about the stupidity of bottled water. I remember a comedian I saw on television once, who did a bit about bottled water: "I don't want the water that comes out of the tap for free. I want to forage for water, like my ancestors did."

-The admittedly biased Huffington Post has an article about how Gov. Sarah Palin said that women who don't vote for another woman are going to hell. Because you know they totally are. Cooties hell. Or Wisteria Lane, maybe.

-I'm sorry, South Park's season premiere is on now. Cartman: "What is wrong with you, Butters? Defeating the Chinese won't mean anything if we do it by going around shooting people in the dick! Goddammit!"

-Today's Free TV on the Internet: I confess I haven't been paying that much attention, but word on the web has it that Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles has put together several of its best episodes in a row, which unfortunately have also been its lowest rated. (io9 has started throwing around comparisons to Drive. Never a good sign for ratings. Watch this week's episode now!

Bits: Everything Sucks Edition

-The bailout approved by Congress last week appears to have done little in the short term to stop the current worldwide financial spiral, though expecting it to have done so may have been unreasonable. Stock markets around the world went sharply downhill Monday. In the US, the Dow Jones dropped below 10000 for the first time in years. In Iceland, the currency was down 7% and the economy appears to be on the verge of collapse. The Frankfurt markets hit the skids after the German government had to perform its own bailout of real estate firms. Russian stock indexes lost over 15% of their value. And so on.

-Here you can find an easy step-by-step process to construct your own "Egg of Time." "Look into its time vortex, and see all that was, and all that will be." Yes.

-Time has a list of words the dictionary is trying to get rid of to make room for 2,000 new words. I am a word geek, and had not heard of any of these.

-New polls from various sources have shown Sen. Barack Obama up in pretty much every swing state, including Minnesota, Michigan, Ohio, Pennsylvania, Virginia, Florida, and New Mexico. However, it's still a month until the election, and we have discussed the accuracy of polls on here before.

-Meanwhile, Cracked.com has come up with a list of 5 presidential elections that were dumber than this one (somehow). It's actually a really good read. I particularly like the caption under the pic of John Quincy Adams: "I'll kill your wife. I don't even care."

-In response to what it says is widespread piracy, Warner Bros. is trying a new tack in Korea... it's going to start releasing its movies online before they hit DVD. How that will help, I'm not totally sure, but it makes sense in other ways.

-The Tampa Bay Rays are in baseball's final four. Hell has told us that it will take more than this for it to freeze over. Hell is just stubborn that way. In other sports news, the Ferocious Walruses fantasy football team remains undefeated. Because I know you've been hanging on every play.

Bits: Space Herpes Edition

-CleanTechnica has posted an article about a "Magnetic Air Car" that purports to be the world's first fuelless car, and hopes to be available by 2010. Apparently, it uses magnets to send compressed air through an enclosed space. "The resulting airflow is then converted to torque." I think there must be more to this than I'm understanding, since I was unaware of air's magnetic properties.

-Sorry Howard Stern, Stephen Colbert is the new "King of All Media." He will be making a guest appearance in the upcoming "Amazing Spider-Man #573." Apparently, in the Marvel Universe, Colbert is a presidential candidate. Can I go live there? The issue's out October 15.

-CNN has managed to come up with what may be the lamest story ever to believably have the headline "Man Punches Shark After 'Death Scream.'"

-Free TV on the Internet: This past week's "Saturday Night Live," with the now-famous Palin/Couric sketch, along with a debate parody and some decent work from Anna Faris, of all people

-The other candidate for "Headline of the Day"... From io9.com: "Space Herpes Is Final Cylon on Battlestar Galactica"

Bits: Theater of the Absurd Edition

-The Machinist today has a great entry on how digitized today's entering college students are, focusing on the Amherst College class of 2012. 99% are on Facebook, 99% have only cell phones, 99% have only laptop computers...

-Michael Grunwald has a great article on Time.com... "Oh, the Drama! McCain in the Theater of the Absurd".

-Watch the Sarah Palin/Katie Couric interview on YouTube. "Saturday Night Live" hardly had to change the words in order make this hysterically awful.

-io9 tells the bizarre story of the recent Season Finale of the Sci-Fi Channel drama "Eureka"... which I recently watched most of without actually realizing it was the series finale. Sci-Fi Channel apparently repeatedly rejected entire plotlines, resulting in the finale basically being improvised by the writers as the episode was filmed... thus lending credence to all those viewers who think "they're just making this up as they go along." "Eureka" is a fun show, but in the end it's inherently "small"... something that, based on my possibly mistaken impressions of what's going on here, may have been Sci-Fi Channel's problem. In other weird news, there's a rumor going around the intertubes that the Sci-Fi Channel wants to change its name to "Beyond." Kay.

-This week's WalrusFile free internet TV pick is the season premiere of "The Office." I'll be trying to come up with a full review of it in the next day or two. In the meantime, discuss amongst yourselves.

-Overlooked News Story of the Day, from the Dayton Daily News: Chemical Irritant Empties Dayton Mosque. An apparent major hate crime not that far from where I live. Sigh.